how hairy? two words: wookie tits
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
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