Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Randomize
