to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
