You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
