that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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