I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
She swung at the pinata with crutches
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
