i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
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