My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
