Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
