I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
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