so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
mondays should just be called national damage control day
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Randomize
