the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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