On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
