dude i'm inner monologue high
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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