I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
