Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
