Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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