Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
