sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I could have mohawked her pubes.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
