You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
