For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Randomize
