plz talk dirty to me
you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Randomize
