Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
