just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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