PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize
