i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize