My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Randomize
