So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Randomize
