Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Randomize
