It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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