You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I'm bleeding and have questions
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Randomize