We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
