Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
