ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
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