We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
