apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Boobs are out for the taking
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
