I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
