no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
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