but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I lost the right to judge tonight
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Randomize
