please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
