so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Randomize
