I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
