that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
