yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
Randomize
