The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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