Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
jump out the window naked night went bad
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
