just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I am one with the molecules
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
