so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
