what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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