I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize
